Making all things NEW (part 1)

If you have been following me online for a while whether it's on my personal Facebook page or the business one at Live Laugh Sew MN, you have probably noticed whenever I write the word NEW I always do it in all capitals. The reason behind it is not just to grab your attention with some NEW thing I am posting about, but a personal story that means a lot to me.

We all have dreams and an idea of what we want our lives to be like. While I have learned that those things are not wrong and in fact can be very healthy, it can also be destructive if you make it the main focus. I always had a strong desire to be married and be a mother. I went down a long road of dating and tried very hard in my own power and control to find a husband. I thought for every year that went by without my husband, I was missing out on my dreams. It was a 7 year journey that even though had some great moments, was a very painful road. Can you identify?

What started all of this was God giving me my first boyfriend at around 19. I had prayed for a few years for God to bring someone into my life and I surrended to Him a list of what I was looking for. I said, this is what I want, but I want what you have for me more. Out of nowhere he seemed to appear and after a few months of a wonderful relationship God took him away (that is a whole other story). For the next 7 years I went down a road of control instead of surrender. What God was asking me to do is be honest with myself and Him and trust that He alone was enough for me whether I had a husband or not. Instead, I rebelled and said I will find someone like this again. I was so afraid that I would be left alone. Have you ever felt that way?

Fast forward a few years and I was now worn out from the dating scene and always being let down by guys who were not ready for marriage and didn't see my value in their life. I felt God tell me, "I am going to make all things new for you." In that same season of life I met a young man online in Texas who was in seminary and we began to date long distance. I felt the next step God leading me to was to move there and date in the same town. I thought he was going to be my husband and that Texas was my "all things new" part. Well, it turns out it was, but with some very differnt turns.

Stay tuned for PART 2.